To say I’ve learned a thing or two over the past four months would be an understatement. When I was younger I would tell my mom, about various life situations, “Well, that was a waste of time…” And she would always reply that “Nothing is a waste of time if you learned something from it… and there is always something to be learned.”
It’s those words that have played over and over in my head over the past several months: that there is a lesson to be learned in all of this. So as I’ve sat reflecting in those small moments when my mind is able to slow down for a little bit, I’ve been able to come up with a list of lessons that I’ve learned during this period of life. Some a lighthearted, some more serious than others, and some in contrast to one another to create a sense of balance.
And while I know that there are likely still more lessons to be learned over the next several months, here is what I’ve taken away so far….
10 LESSONS I’VE LEARNED
1. Walks Are Our Best Friend: Let’s start on a slightly more lighthearted note. When the *it is about to hit the fan, my favorite thing to say is “Let’s all go for a walk…” I’m so grateful we live in an area that is spacious and walking friendly… they’re our saving grace.
2. Kids Really Don’t Need That Much: When we first started the “stay at home” adventure I thought having a new activity for Harper everyday would be the best thing…. I even bought her a few new toys (in full disclosure, we rarely buy toys over here, I tend to just let her use her imagination and things around the house…). What I realized is that she much preferred personalized attention, building forts, running around outside, and dance parties to structured activities. It reminded me that children really don’t need that much… lots of love, good structure + rules, and a safe base + environment to allow their imagination to flourish….
3. Well, I’m Really Not That Good At Imaginative Play: Previous point being said, I realized I kind of suck at coming up with pretend play (we all have our strengths, right). So I’ve allowed Harper to take the lead in this area… rather than leading, I simply follow her lead. She wants to play Queens + Monsters… alright then!
4. To Extend Myself Grace: I tend to be routined and relatively set in the ways that make the house run. That’s all good when life’s circumstances are “normal.” It took me some time to release and become more flexible with some of the routines that were likely causing more stress in the end. It was okay if we ordered take out more than we used to… if Harper watched a little more T.V. than usual… and if the house wasn’t clean all.the.time. Telling myself “it’s ok,” more often is something that I hope to take beyond this small period in life…
5. That I Really Like Vacations: We had a few milestone trips planned this year to celebrate some big life moments (i.e. our 10 year wedding anniversary) and while I was 100% on board with postponing them, this time has made me realize what I appreciate most about trips away: the ability to 100% disconnect. We did a staycation for a week, but for me, it was hard to fully disconnect. And while I am so very grateful for the time we took that week, and hope to do it again soon, it did remind me of why I value “getting away.”
6. That I Really Love Home: On the flip side, I’ve come to realize how much I love “home” and what “home” means to us as a family. The memories we made in our backyard when we couldn’t go anywhere… having a blow up pool in our living room on a rainy day… and our cozy fireplace we sat in front of with a little wine on the rainy Friday nights, and a hallway that lends itself to bowling, ball rolling, running, and anything Harper’s imagination can come up with….
7. Do Not Put Off For Tomorrow What Can Be Done Today: Clichéd saying, yes, but never has something felt more true than it has now. I haven’t seen my grandma (who lives in a retirement home) since February… never did I think I would go that long without seeing her. There are friends I used to see frequently, who I haven’t seen for months, and there were certain things I had on my list of goals to accomplish for this year that will likely be put on hold until this passes. I hope this is never something that I forget from this time… that life and the time we have been given is not guaranteed. So do what you need to do, be with who you want to be, and do the things you’ve been wanting to do….
8. That I Value, + Need, Independence, Yet At The Same Time Crave Companionship: Simply put, there has never been a time that I have craved quietness, solitude, and time to myself more than I have in the past several months… yet there has never been a time where I have craved the company, activity, noice, laughter, and conversation of close family + friends more.
9. That I Don’t Need Trader Joe’s: As much as I love Trader Joe’s, I went four months without shopping there… and, GASP, was still able to make delicious + easy meals.
10. That *S L O W I N G* Down Doesn’t Mean Living Less: These past four months forced us to slow down. To live a slower pace of life. And it lead to creativity in our marriage (i.e. date nights at home), creativity in the kitchen (TJ has become quite the chef…), a flourishing relationship between Harper + Camille (that likely might not have happened so quickly if Harper was heading off to pre-school several days a week), and seeing a sense of community in our neighborhood I’d never seen before.
