It’s hard to believe that today is our eight year anniversary…. it was nice spending the weekend away, and reflecting on how our relationship has grown and changed over the years. TJ + I met young, when I was 21 + he was 23… We met 13 years ago, right after Super Bowl Sunday… he tried to play the 3 day rule… and I was almost like “buh bye….” buuuuut, he picked up the phone and the rest is history. We dated for 5 years before getting married… and waited another 5 years before having Harper. We knew when we got married there were so many things we wanted to do together…. travel, build a strong foundation (both financially + emotionally) together, solidify our careers (TJ went back for a MBA + I completed my licensing exam….), and experience all that being “newlywed” entailed…. and while it held a lot of amazing times, there were also challenging times as well…. where we had to really work to see the other’s perspective, demonstrate compassion + grace, and say “I’m sorry…”

Over the years, I’ve come to realize a few things about marriage….. no marriage is ever perfect or void of conflict…. and if it is, you’re not really talking to each other…. when you bring two different people into a relationship together, there are differences of opinion and thought…. so a good relationship isn’t one where there isn’t conflict… it’s one that is able to manage the disagreements in healthy ways. One that embraces changes, and adapts…. it might not be easy at first, but you work together. A relationship isn’t always 50/50 either. Sometimes I put in more than TJ and vice versa…. sometimes it’s 70/30 and other times it’s an even split… it’s not about keeping score, rather appreciating the other’s efforts, and knowing that someday the tides will shift. Being able to really talk to one another is crucial. To be able to really say how you feel… and to be able to really hear that feedback is paramount….. A good cry or a good laugh can usually set things right….

And, when we asked each other the number one piece of advice we’d give to someone (if they ever asked…) it would be to “always date one another” and “water your own grass….” When the effort is there, and the foundation is strong, you can weather those rainy, even stormy, days together.
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(Outfit Details || Skirt (c/o) | Sweater, more sizes + on sale! (also own in gray) | Shoes (identical and cheaper) | TJ’s Jeans (c/o) | TJ’s Top | TJ’s Shoes)

Photos by Sofia Ann Photography