11.10.2017

Motherhood Update || 23 Months

I finished yesterday’s blog post before TJ actually arrived home with my “new” phone. It appears we had a miscommunication (I mean, that never happens between couples, right???)… after fiddling with my phone for a little while and getting all my apps back, I asked him where the old phone was so we could try and get it turned on to back-up + restore 2 years worth of memories. He looked at me quizzically and said, “Um, it’s at the store. They’re destroying it since they gave us a new one.” Cue tantrum. My mind went through the past two years and all the memories that had seemingly disappeared with a simple technology glitch (and, let’s be honest, negligence on my behalf for not backing it up… or purchasing three dollars worth of extra cloud space….). Tears started to run down my face…. Harper’s birth, those precious few days right after she was born…. our first trip together as a family of three… Hawaii trips…. her first Christmas… her first birthday…. and then I fast forwarded to years later and her questioning me why she didn’t have more photos from her childhood (I know, I’m catastrophizing slightly….)….

I ended up calling Apple, and to make a very long 5 hour afternoon spent at the store short, I have my memories back. Yet, as I sat there, with nothing else to do but think (it’s amazing what can happen when you can’t use your phone) I started to think about why this was so important to me. They’re just photos. Yet, they’re so much more than that. Sometimes I look at my little girl and realize just how much time has passed, yet it feels like yesterday I went into labor. It’s hard to really remember those first few weeks… between the exhaustion + overwhelming sense of everything being new… and that’s where the photos come into play. Simply looking at them can bring me back to those moments (both good + bad). Seeing the photo of her on my chest for the first time brings back that same mixture of feelings I felt… so full of love for my little girl, yet fearful of my abilities all at the same time. And I know the years will fly by so quickly, and one day the furry of these hectic days will pass, and these images will be what I have to remind me of the feelings (all of them, no matter what they are) and memories we all made together….

And so, had this whole thing with the phone not have happened, I’m sure this post would have taken a different perspective… but it was a great reminder (and probably 5 people at the apple store also reminded me of this) to cherish those memories and keep them safe (or, in my case… back that it up!)…..

(Leather leggings, Fur Vest, My tee, Harper’s Vest)

The Most Challenging/Most Rewarding: I lumped these two categories together this month because for me, they’re one in the same. One of the most rewarding things for me, as Harper’s mom, is to see her budding independence… her preferences maturing… and her wanting to have a say in her life. It means she feels comfortable expressing herself… and her needs… which is something I always want her to feel as she grows. Yet, when it’s time to go and she can’t decide which pair of shoes she wants to put on… it can be a little crazy making (but then again, I wonder where she gets that from… I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree)…. Or, maybe a better example is how she likes to choose where she gets her diaper changed. She used to refuse to let me change her diaper, so I learned to give her the choice. I have to change her diaper, but she can choose where. We’ve chosen the closet…. her tipi…. the kitchen floor… and she tried to get me to do it in a chair, but I had to veto that one since there simply wasn’t enough room. Through the challenges, I’ve learned that choosing my battles is essential. Standing up on the kitchen table, not an option, too dangerous. Where I change your diaper, totally negotiable. I guess that’s what parenthood is… striking the balance and figuring out which situations are worthy of the battle.

(My anorak, Jeans, Thermal, Booties, Harper’s Jacket, Dress, Jeggings, Shoes)

Harper’s Favorite Things: Hands down, her two number one (if that makes sense) things right now are books (she just wants us to “reeeee” to her) and Goldie + Bear (the TV show). And while she doesn’t watch much TV (just when I need to get ready) there is something about that show that makes her laugh and smile (I like it too since Goldie is always problem solving and demonstrating how to be kind)…. and her favorite books are anything to do with animals (she has a taken a real liking to frogs as of late). She loves the moon and looks for it every time we are outside…. and jumping on the bed has become her favorite athletic activity. I love seeing how her likes change over time. It always leaves TJ and me guessing as to the type of little girl she is going to grow up to be….

The other day TJ asked “Does she ever just walk? I feel like she is always running….” and then we of course thought that maybe she’ll be a runner when she grows up… and then she goes and kicks a ball and we think she’ll be a soccer player…. but then she goes and uses sidewalk chalk and we think an artist…. so, I guess we pretty much think she can be anything……

(Joggers, Hoodie, Harper’s Joggers, Sweatshirt)

Sleeping, Eating, Wellness: I was pretty certain we were going to have some issues with the time change, but Harper somehow managed it amazingly well and ended up sleeping pretty late… then the next day she came down with a cough, so I think she might not have been feeling well (but TJ and I will always take the extra sleep!). For her cough, the doctor recommended honey… so be picked up some Zarbee’s Honey for her cough and it appears to have helped really well. We also used this humidifier in her room. We spent the past few days just hanging out so that she could get better… and it’s been nice. I feel like life with a toddler is so frequently spent on the go, that just hanging out has been a welcome change.

She goes between wanting to sit in her high chair, and a “big girl” chair to eat… and how successfully she eats in each is different (the former gets better results….). I’ve been sharing a few of her meals on instastories, but if that is something you want an entire post dedicated to, let me know!

(Stripe Tee)

Relationships: I came across this article yesterday and it gave me a few good tears and made me think of all my old girlfriends whose relationships mean so much to me. And since becoming a mom it’s been the biggest challenge for me…. I love my newer friends, but there is something about the bond with my older ones that is just unmatchable (is that a word??). I guess it’s kind of like the song, “Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the others gold….”  I hope to instill within Harper the power of female friendships. That when you find the right friends, it’s as if they are an extension of your family. It’s something I hope to model for her, and a bond that I hope she can witness.

I continue to be forever grateful for having TJ to do this parenthood journey with. Do we argue at times… duh. Do we not agree about things. Who can possibly agree all the time? But do we work well as a team and support one another? Yes (although, in an argument we both might disagree….). And continuing to invest in our marriage with date nights and days makes us a stronger couple, and a happy couple makes for a happy home for Harper.

Wish us luck in this coming month!

Comments

  1. Amanda says:

    Would love to see a post on Harpers meals – always looking for new ideas for my 18 mo old son 🙂

  2. I love all of Harper’s outerwear! (ps the link to her anorok went straight the Gap homepage instead of the item) The camera roll on my phone is my everything- I’m trying to get better at taking photos with our real (expensive) camera because technology can fail us at any moment. Sometimes I think it was better back in the day when we had to print photos to see them, at least then we have them. No computer glitch, no software glitch, no cloud failed backups to wipe away our documented memories.

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