To think that I only have 10 weeks left to go is shocking. It feels like yesterday that I experienced all the emotion and shock of seeing two pink lines. With the holidays coming up, I have a feeling that the last part of my pregnancy is going to fly by. She’s going to be here before I know it. With all that being said, so much seems to be happening each and every passing week. So today is a quick update as I hit the 30 week mark (you can find the other updates here, here, here, here).
General Feelings & Thoughts: I know I mentioned last month that someone must have turned on the water-works… but man, these past couple of weeks have been a doozy. Everything from a touching news segment to a small bump in the day has me in tears. Now, it’s not everyday… but admittedly it was 4 out of the 7 days last week. Sometimes I can’t even explain why I was crying. I got a little worried there for a minute, so I quickly texted my mom, who assured me that it was normal for the third trimester. This week has been much better 🙂
Fears: I have a lot of them at this point. Not a crippling amount, but an amount that I feel is pretty normal. I still fear the delivery. Since I’ve never done it, I don’t know what to expect. Luckily, in this department, I have many friends who have gone before me and have provided me with reassuring words. Even the ones who had a less than positive experience have something encouraging to say. My fear is likely driven by my hatred of pain (I about had a panic attack at my doctor’s appointment on Monday when I was administered a shot in the bum.) and less by the uncertainty of which mode she will enter the world. I fear the changes that will be coming too. Yes, still. I have come to the realization that this is normal, through conversations with my parents and friends… as well as my own knowledge of the life cycle process. TJ and I have been in the life-stage of being a “married couple” for close to six years. We have established our own way of doing things and have a genuine enjoyment of one another. Knowing that we will be shifting out of “married couple,” and into the second phase of “family” is scary at times. In graduate school we talked about the significance of having rituals to help put aside one life-stage and welcome in another. We’ve talked about ways to do this, and of course it includes traveling, just the two of us, to some of our favorite spots. We’re starting with Carmel this coming weekend and will likely make one last trip as a farewell to that stage of our life in a few weeks. The more we talk about the change, the easier it comes for me.
Eats: Cravings and hunger pains seemingly surpassed me in my first and second trimesters. Yet, they decided to appear in this last stage. Nothing too crazy… usually it’s pumpkin related. Right now I am loving these pumpkin bars (albeit they are a healthier sweet) and Trader Joe’s Pumpkin Seeds and Cranberry Chips (they have cinnamon sugar on them and are oh so tasty). I’m back to craving meats and sandwiches. Hearty, delicious, sandwiches with lots of avocado! And I seem to have an insatiable amount of hunger. Like hungry all the time. My solution is just to snack on lots of fruits and vegetables to be sure that Harper, and myself, get the nutrients we need.
Exercise: I have my days in this department. I’m still moving everyday, as I feel incredibly sluggish if I don’t. The running has drastically decreased (although I’m not sure if that is due to the fact that it has been both too dark and too hot in the mornings lately…) but I’ve been enjoying lots of hikes, which have provided me with the challenge that I have been needing. I still continue to spin and use the elliptical at the gym. Weights are a continued area of focus for me, as they help me to feel stronger. And, I still can’t rave enough about Tracey Anderson’s pregnancy project… the perfect combinations to get my heart rate going and help me stay strong. I’ve also enjoyed continuing the circuit workouts I created here and here. This past week I have been battling a cold, so I have been enjoying some light walks in the fall-like morning weather. The working out also allows me time to think and reflect on all the changes that are happening. When I’m working out, I’m able to be present with myself and the journey I am taking… it’s also a time when I listen to my body the closest.
Body: I do have to admit that seeing those numbers on the scale increase is never easy. I never weighed myself before I was pregnant. I just never found it to be healthy or conducive to meeting health and fitness goals (for me personally). So seeing it, now on a bi-weekly basis at my doctor’s appointments, is a little shocking. No major meltdowns in this past month. I’ve been cognizant to continue to dress to my body. Dresses that accentuate the bump, nothing too frumpy (I really don’t want to be adding extra at this point), and accessorizing to make older pieces feel new again have worked for me. Of course, there are days where I can’t believe that I still have 10 more weeks to go… really? It’s going to get bigger?? How is that even possible? I’m going to be waddling by the time Christmas rolls around. Oh, and bending over has become quite the task! Tonight I had to have TJ pull my boots off my feet.
Things I’ve Become More Aware Of: We recently decided it was time to get Captain trained (yes, I know… he’s a year and a half and we just now decided??) to address barking and a few other issues. It was an intensive, in home program, for 3 hours. The trainer gave us homework to complete with Captain on a nightly basis, rules we needed to create for him, and hammered home the importance of us “dog parents” being on the same page. Now, this is what I do on a regular, daily basis with parents, so it was interesting to be on the other side. That being said, it taught TJ and me a lot about our “parenting” style and helped us work together, as a team, to communicate. While I know this is simply a dog, and won’t be the same as parenting a child, it was reassuring to know that we were able to successfully eliminate many of Captain’s behaviors by working together.
Another issue that I have become more aware of as I move closer to actually holding Harper, is how fiercely protective I will be of her. This stretches from people to things she will eat. The majority of questions to my doctor are about how “will it impact Harper?” as opposed to how it will impact me. I guess motherly instincts kick in quicker than I thought.
What I’m Looking Forward To: With each day, Harper’s kicks grow in strength. I still catch myself sometimes and can’t believe that our daughter is growing inside of me, and I feel blessed. With all the fears I have talked about, I am also overwhelmed with excitement to see how TJ and I navigate these new roles together. He can’t wait to change diapers (yay for me, right??) and see her gummy smile. I can’t wait to have her little fingers wrap around mine, and to sing her the songs my parents used to sing to me (“Jesus Loves Me” and “Let There Be Peace on Earth.”). I can’t wait to see my parents be grandparents and Allison be an Aunt (she’s already planned out her outings with Harper for the next 5 years :)). At my shower, TJ wrote a message and it read like this:
“I am the luckiest guy on this earth to be married to you! I will love Harper with all of my heart, but you will always be my #1 lady! I look forward to showing Harper what true love is, and how a man should treat a woman. I am looking forward to this next awesome chapter and all of the memories we will make as a family of 3 + Cappy. I love you!”
That what’s I am excited for!
For her: Admittedly, I’ve gone a little crazy as of late. I couldn’t resist this adorable lace dress paired with these shoes, and I am obsessed with this boho number my Aunt bought her! I also had to do a mommy and me something, so I picked up this little striped top. We also received practical items from the shower such as this ergo carrier, car seat, and infant tub.
For her room: It’s coming together nicely, and I’m hoping to do a reveal here on the blog! For now, you can check out the design board.
For me: Exciting news, the weather is supposed to cool way down next week. In that light, I can’t wait to wear these leather leggings again (for the third season in a row), along with a favorite oversized sweater (which isn’t that oversized anymore). I’m also loving button downs, and simply buying them three sizes bigger :). This plaid number came home with me last week, and I’m eyeing this one too. I also can’t stop wearing this sweater skirt. The waist band is perfect for my expanding belly, and I know I will wear it post pregnancy too. Oh, and I found these tops, and couldn’t help but buy multiple colors for the last two months. They will stretch, are super cute, and I will be able to wear them post pregnancy.