Being a grown up is tough. Remember when we were in elementary school and our most troublesome worry was whether or not you would be the first one to the handball courts (or monkey bars, slides, whatever your fancy was back then)? And the only bills we had to pay were whatever we owed on our plastic house property in Monopoly? One of my favorite parts about being a kid (AKA 0-18) was that I could leave school that day, and tell my friends, “See you tomorrow!” because unless one of us were sick or had an appointment, we would see each other the next day at school, and make plans to do it the next day all over again. I suppose that’s one of the ways in which college was such a culture shock-those old friends you grew up seeing everyday, you typically only see during school breaks. And then when you graduate from college, your contact with each other is completely contingent on mutual efforts. So what are we girls (and guys too, for that matter) to do if we want to maintain those oh so important relationships, without sacrificing job attendance or performance, our new, “grown-up” lives, etc.? Having experienced these challenges, we decided to put together 5 tips for maintaining friendships through thick and thin!

1. Kill 2 birds with one stone– Instead of sitting down drinking cocktails or coffees, try a hike with a friends, a walk/run train together, go shopping together, etc. You’ll get two very important things accomplished at one time!

2. Get Away: Once a year, schedule a weekend getaway. Anything more than that is probably pushing it. And try to make it the same weekend every year-a designated “Girl’s Weekend” that you can look forward to and commit to.

3. Chains: The good thing about today’s technology: we are not relegated to snail mail! If you’re like me and have groups of friends, utilize the technology and start a text chain, email chain, Facebook thread, etc….whatever works best for your group of friends!

4. Don’t forget the small stuff: “Happy birthdays,” “thinking of you’s,” “congratulations…” all so important, but since they’re so simple, are often neglected and/or forgotten. I can’t tell you how much it brightens my day to send AND receive “I just saw…and it made me think of you,” or “I just randomly remembered that one time when…” A quick, simple text can have an enormous effect.

5. Alter Expectations: This is something I’ve had to do a lot lately. As people grow in different ways, and our lives take different directions, it’s important to remember that friendships, and relationships in general, change. Modifying our expectations of each other (and ourselves) is important in keeping realistic, and helps us avoid becoming bitter and/or holding grudges.

I think everyone would agree that friendships are one of the most important parts of anyone’s life. After all, friends can have so many different roles. So naturally we want to maintain these relationships the best we can. So what are you waiting for? Take out your phone and get connected!


  1. Gah, This came at the perfect time. While it is not “the same” as our college days, growing older and fostering those friendships are so important. You gals hit the head on the nail “mutual effort” — I’m learning now about “seasons of friendship”, and while I still fight it,its comforting to know that although its not the same as years past, I need to find comfort in the commonalities we do have, at this point in our lives and use that to continue our bond. Fantastic post ladies!

    • Shannon&Allison says:

      So very true. Good, female friendships are so important in life 🙂

  2. Annette Roberts says:

    great thoughts and ones that I totally agree with….our friends ARE important and definitely worth cultivating !!!

  3. I love the idea of getting a workout in and catching up with friends at the same time! It’s so hard with busy schedules and “life.”

    • Shannon&Allison says:

      It’s one of my favorite ways to catch up with my friends 🙂